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Being Safe On BDSM Sites

Not only does one have to be safe when it comes to meeting other BDSM friendly individuals at munches, play parties, dungeons but for those who like to explore BDSM and M/s relationships online, there are a few tips to not only be safe but keep you from having a bad experience. Exploring one's BDSM side or even trying to find your way in the BDSM ocean, you must be careful not to end up in choppy or shark-infested waters.

Now, there are sites where one can interact or even find online Masters', Mistresses', submissives', slaves along with friendships and mentors. I have been on a few and there are some which boasts some good results in getting in touch with other individuals who are into and enjoy the BDSM lifestyle.

1. Do not give out your personal information within three seconds of meeting someone online. Like your mother told you not to get into stranger's cars it is the same with giving out your personal information of email address, phone number, social security or any item which can likely be used against you. I have had plenty of people I have met through such sites who ask me for my number a few minutes into talking. I may be out there in the public interacting with various BDSM individuals but I am not going to give my home address and what time I am going to be alone in the house with no one around to hear me. Sorry, but be smart about your safety especially when talking to someone new.

2. If you have to be told you have to give someone a gift or 'tribute' as in money through grams or websites, especially told this within the first fifteen minutes of talking to the other person, you are setting yourself up to be scammed. Not everyone on such a BDSM community is a scam artist but to be asked for money right away to even be allowed to make anymore chat is not what you signed up for. We do not want people thinking we are gold diggers or scam artists. No one I have met online or in person ask me for money so I can continue speaking to them. Anyone that does try, I will usually ask if I have ATM written on my forehead. If I want to waste money to talk to someone, I can go to a therapist and at least I know where my money is going to go and if I am going to see the person ever again.

3. Watch out if the questions or interactions with someone online seems a bit off. Does the person ask you right away your breast size? If you are alone? How about if you are going to get on web cam to perform some sort of sexual act? Be careful because sometimes you may come across someone who is trying to get their rocks off without adding anything to the conversation. I can understand if you are looking for it as well but with the way internet works, you little strip tease on the web cam can be recorded and placed on hundreds of websites. Just because you want to get to know your kinks does not mean you should show yourself off to the whole world.

4. If and when you plan to meet such a Master/Mistress/submissive/slave/switch and so forth offline and in person, always do it in a well lighted and populated place. In fact, do it in a place where you would feel the most comfortable. Have the meeting in a coffee shop to talk over scones and lattes. Perhaps even go to a mall or area where there are going to be people around. Never meet such a person offline in an area like a park or in your own home. Not to say every person you meet on a BDSM site is going to be shady but you want to take the precaution to not bring home someone who is not going to respect your personal boundaries.

Last, but not least:

5. Take things slowly once you do meet or the online getting to know one another becomes deeper. Do not feel you know someone within a week or feel you should do anything significant like going to a munch or to a play party within a few days of knowing one another. You might feel an instant connection with the other individual but remember not to rush into things. In fact, get to know people outside of the one person. Plus you do not want to rush into something and find it may not be the thing you wanted in the first place. Always set a limit to where things should go and everything will come along.

Whip in one hand and tempting apple in the other,

Miss Marguerite


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